From the peeing on a stick to the dating scan, your first 12 weeks as a dad can be time that is mostly spent wondering what the heck is going on.
After going through the ordeal of an ectopic pregnancy in the latter part of 2016, my partner (Laura) and I decided to give the whole baby thing another go but with chances low of another successful pregnancy happening first time we were not holding our breath.
It took two attempts with a pregnancy test until we found out that Laura was 1-2 weeks pregnant. Of course I was happy with the news even if I didn’t jump around the room with joy because that isn’t really how I show my emotion, plus with the last time, I did not want to get my hopes up too much (just in case).
The time leading up to the scan
As I said at the beginning of this post, you do spend a lot of time wondering what is going on. This is will be my first child so like many others, I am going through this for the first time. All I can suggest for anyone else going through the first 12 weeks is to communicate with your partner and make sure you are going through it together because I can be sure that she will feel as much in the dark as you probably do (even if it isn’t her first time). Laura spent a lot of her time looking at blog posts and apps for her phone like pregnancy + – available on Apple & Android.
I’ve been told by Laura that mood swings and paranoia are completely normal and usually unjustified while her hormones are all over the place but it does not make them any easier to go through as the target. The first time Laura started accusing me of all these things and to be completely honest, it did hurt me but trying to remain calm I tried to assure her that I do love her and I am not doing anything I shouldn’t be. It wasn’t until the next day when the storm had died down that the change in mood was down to her hormones being all over the place. So now, although it is still hard to go through, I know that I need to stay calm because It is not her fault and she doesn’t like her ‘moments of madness’ as much as I do. – I will go into this further on a separate blog post because I feel this is one of the hardest things the dad has to go through in the first 12 weeks, if I new about this before hand them maybe I wouldn’t let them upset me as much as they did.
12 weeks have passed and we are sitting in the waiting room just about to go in for our 12 week scan. Laura sitting next to me silently having a nervous breakdown while I tried to break the nerves with awkward chit chat. We are called into the room and comes the moment to close the first 12 weeks of pregnancy, the ultrasound! The jelly is applied to Laura’s bump and my comment of every scan looking the same goes down like a ton of bricks. Then we are told to look at the screen in the corner of the room and there it is, the baby. It hit me, I was going to be a dad and it looked a lot more like a little tiny human than I was expecting.
I really don’t think the notion of being a dad really sinks in until after you see it for the first time and even then, while I was buying the domain for this site, it still felt odd calling myself a dad!
How did you find your first 12 weeks?